If there’s one thing we can learn from our favorite romantic films and TV series, it’s that there’s someone special waiting for each of us little ways down the road. Ted Mosby found his perfect wife at the end of How I Met Your Mother, every single Jude Apatow film follows the basic premise of a perfect match, and basically all Matthew McConaughey film before he landed True Detective revolved around the idea of finding “the one.”
It all boils down to the same idea. Admittedly, it always works because truth to be told, we all aspire the same thing. However, is the idea of “the one” really applicable to the real life?
Apparently, a couples therapist claims that ‘the one’ doesn’t exist.
According to Esther Perel, a couples’ therapist and author of “Mating in Captivity” and “The State of Affairs,” the idea of “the one” came from the cognitive dissonance – a psychological state that drives us into having inconsistent thoughts particularly those that involve behavioral decisions and attitude change.
Cognitive dissonance makes many people believe they’ve already found the right one.
Regarding the subject, Perel explained:
We come up with all the arguments to justify why that was the right person. But this is the way that we like to have coherence; we can’t agree with the idea that I chose this person, but it’s not the right one. So we make it fit.
While a person can be compatible to you, it does not mean that you are automatically a matchmade in heaven.
Research also explains that believing in “destiny” or other similar superficial beliefs can even be downright hazardous to your relationship. Furthermore, Perel stated:
There is never ‘The One.’ There is a one that you choose and with whom you decide that you want to build something. But in my opinion, there could also have been others — you just chose this one. And when you choose one, you renounce others. … Then you decide that because you’ve chosen that person, you turn that person into The One.
Well, for what it’s worth, despite her being right, most of her pointers actually lean more on the technical side. Regardless, if you love someone, scientific labels do not matter. The important thing is that you’re comfortable with each other.
Bees Kill Penguins by Stinging Them in the Eyes
2000 Kilogram Sunfish Caught Off North African Coast
Man Embezzles $57K in COVID-19 Relief to Buy Pokemon Cards
Florida Man Catches and “Recycles” Alligator in Driveway
Man Shocks Reporter on How He’d Spend the Lottery Winnings
Man Joins Search Operation Not Realizing He’s the One Missing
World’s Oldest Rhino Dies in Italian Zoo at 54 Years Old
Meet Quilty – Cat Escape Artist Helping Other Cats Jailbreak
Fans Use American Flag to Save Falling Cat During Football Game in Miami
TikToker Shares How She Tricked Invaders Who Tried Opening The Hotel Door While She Was Alone
Man Iced Neighbor Who Repeatedly Asked Him “When Are You Getting Married?”
Do You Live in One of These 15 Countries With The Most Beautiful Women on Earth?
The Secret Meaning of Anklets And Why Some Wives Wear Them
Waking Up Between 3 to 5 AM Could Mean You’re Experiencing Spiritual Awakening
Divorced Man Wrote 20 Epic Marriage Advice He Wished He Could Have Had
Haunting Photos of Two Tourists Snapped Just Before They Mysteriously Disappeared
“Chastity Cages” is the Latest Thing for Men
Pork Fat Is Officially One of the World’s Most Nutritious Foods
Some Stranger Padlocked This Guy’s Earlobe And Ran Away With The Key
Three-Month-Old Baby Left Blind in One Eye After Family Friend Took His Picture