Sometimes people stay longer in a relationship, not because of pure love. It can be that you feel you can’t function without the other person or that you just feel that the relationship is convenient. There are also those who are not really into the person – it’s just that they want to fix them.
You may think you’re in love but the truth is, you just want to be in a relationship with your man because you want to be that girl who repairs him after he got broken by his previous lover. While that may make you somehow a good person, staying for long will never be healthy for both of you. Here are signs that you’re not genuinely in love with your man but you just want to fix him.
#1. You are focused on repairing him than looking out for yourself.
You’re too keen on avoiding your own issues because you’d rather focus on those who have bigger problems. You need to be around someone who will make your own baggage seem less significant as that could provide you a sense of relief.
#2. You think it’s time to find someone new after a serious relationship.
Most likely, one who needs fixing will be the best candidate in this case. When it’s time for you to start a new relationship, you tend to be overly concerned about things that you “need to” be doing. In this case, you’d go for a relationship that has greater challenges.
#3. You’re hesitant to move on.
And the result is usually you turning him into a purpose. When you feel you’re stuck in a relationship, you make him the excuse for staying put. The best reason you’re staying is that “he needs me,” even if that doesn’t mean you’re truly happy.
#4. You still want to know what’s there to like about him.
Thinking of things that make you like your partner is not necessary in every relationship but it should be something very easy to do. But in your case, you just have yet to discover what they actually are.
#5. You’re under the belief that you can make someone change because you want them to.
People can change – that’s a fact, but you can’t force someone to change into the person you think is ideal for you. You’re not in love if you’re staying in a toxic relationship just because you believe time will come he’ll change his ways.’
#6. Affection becomes your relationship’s currency.
You need appreciation. But your relationship has become symbiotic: he loves you if you give him affection.
#7. You’d prefer feeling vulnerable than not caring at all
You will always want to care for someone. Being vulnerable is much better than being alone so you choose the former.
#8. You feel the need to build someone up.
You may have your own dreams but you can’t help but be there for someone always. While that’s not altogether a bad thing, you have to do it for the right reasons.
#9. You love the idea of love.
You love the concept of love, not so much of being “in lovve.” It’s like you’re wired to give love to others and time will come when things doesn’t make sense if you’re not in a relationship.
#10. People with excess baggage are attractive.
You are easily attracted to someone with excess baggage because you want to support that person, especially if he cannot do it himself. You feel best if you care for someone and you want to pour all your energy to solve all his problems.
#11. You like the feeling of being needed.
You are happy when someone needs you. You like the idea of having someone relying on you and the feeling that comes from it somehow makes you feel secure.
#12. You need something constant in your life.
Since you feel someone is relying on you, you assume that they’ll reciprocate the feelings by being faithful. You’ll always hope that you’ll get something in return after all the good things you’ve done for him.
#13. You don’t like to see him fail.
You may have fallen out of love but you choose to stay because you don’t want to see him fail. You can’t bear seeing him doing badly especially if you know so well what he’s capable of doing.
#14. You just care too much.
This does not only involve your romance but everyone. You care too much about everything that’s going on in other people’s lives. You can’t help but involve yourself in someone else’s life.
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