Today, manners matter, especially among the youth. If you want to your kid to be kind, generous and good-mannered, it all boils down to one thing – good parenting skills.
You should set a good example to your kids and at the same time, not tolerate what they’re doing wrong. This way, you will raise children who are not rude to others. Besides, let’s face it: when we encounter rude people, we would often wonder how they were raised.
Discipline and good manners can be taught in the home with patience and consistency. If you want your child to grow generous, good-mannered and sensitive, here are the 5 things you should not be doing.
1. Do Not Be Afraid Of Your Kids
Children are good in manipulation. If you’re afraid of your kids’ tantrums and you always give in to what they demand or want, they’ll grow up ill-mannered. They would always whine, cry or shout whenever they want something, even if you said you can’t give them what they want.
When the kids become manipulative, they’ll grow up as people who will never be satisfied with what they have. This can be a big problem, especially for parents who are not well-off to buy everything their kids want. Parents can bend this by being firm in saying “no” to their kids. You should not always give in to their wants, just because you want to please them or you want to give them what you did not have when you’re their age.
Do not give “unearned privileges” and learn to tell your kids that they do not always get what they want. Moreover, teach your kids to distinguish the difference between their needs and wants.
2. Do Not Downplay Their Bad Behavior
Parents often make excuses to downplay the bad behavior of their kids. This is a no-no when it comes to parenting. Be firm and strict when it comes to good behavior and do not tell others excuses when your kids misbehave. Do not tell others that kids are kids or that’s just how they are because this encourages the pattern of behavior.
Learn to manage your kids’ tantrums early on because the longer you wait to initiate discipline in your children, the harder it will be to break the bad habits they are already used to.
3. Do Not Caution Others Not To Scold Them
In the past, teachers and other relatives can contribute in the discipline of your child. They can eventually help in honing good manners and etiquette among the young ones. However, today, parents are so protective of their kids, they frown or get mad when others try to discipline their children.
Teachers and relatives can scold your child when they find him or her misbehaving, within reason. Let them show your child that what he or she is doing is bad or rude. This way, your child will know what others think about the behavior and eventually, try to change for the better.
4. Do Not Spoil Them
When you have a child, you want him or her to have everything in the world, especially if you were not able to experience them in the past. However, you should draw a line between giving them rewards and motivational treats and spoiling them. Giving them everything they want will eventually fire back at you, as they may grow the habit of being spoiled brats.
Teach your child patience and do not tolerate rude behavior. Be firm with your rules and once they break them, you should tell them that it’s bad and for some parents, giving the kids a “time out” or a form of punishment (such as restricting television time, for example) is effective.
5. Do Not Give Them Shortcuts
Some parents do not want their kids to have a hard time. When your child becomes impatient and cranky inside the restaurant, do not just give him or her an iPad just to calm them down. Teach your child the importance of patience without the need of gadgets. Moreover, you can teach your child patience and be independent is through letting him or her help with household chores. Let them put their plates in the sink or clean their room, even when you have housekeepers.
Raising kids are indeed a daunting task. However, you can inculcate good manners through many ways.
What are your parenting styles when dealing with your children? Share your thoughts in the comments section below.
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