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Five Probable Reasons Why We Keep Dating Emotionally Unavailable People.

Stop the cycle if you can…

Let me tell you about the story of a girl who fell in love with someone who can’t love her back the way she wanted him to…Oh wait…that’s the story of the A LOT of people here on earth, right?

Well the thing is, many people are guilty of this. Men and women alike have a tendency to fall for someone who is not emotionally available. We stay in a relationship, no matter how long we’ve been hurting because most of us are waiting for things to come around – for that other person to ‘see’ our worth, for that person to eventually  love us the way we wanted them to. Sadly, even if we got the chance to leave a hellish relationship, chances are we’ll fall for the same type of person again.

Other than thinking of why those relationships failed and how badly most of our ex-lovers treated us, why don’t we figure out why we keep dating emotionally unavailable people? Here are five probable reasons why:

#1. Getting them to love us would be a great validation of our own worth.

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Photo credit: bwalles

If we can get that person, that one elusive, totally detached person to love us, it could mean that we are good enough to be loved. Knowing that we made someone, who is incapable of love or commitment to fall for us would surely boost our self-esteem.

I think that’s also why so many women are drawn to men with a “bad-boy” image. Somehow there’s a challenge to that but there’s also danger because  we can’t change anyone, and they certainly won’t change because of us. Besides, I don’t think love is about “changing the people we love”, right? This also brings us to point #2.

#2. Control.

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Photo credit: hdwallpaperscool

Most people want to be in control because they want to feel safe. They want to change their partner’s behavior according to what they deem fit because maybe, they’re also scared that if that person changes into someone that can not be controlled, that person would realize that we’re not what they need…and leave.

#3. It’s easier to look at other’s faults than our own.

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Photo credit: imagestocks

Its always a bit scary and hurtful when we are told about our shortcomings and flaws. Some of us get hurt by criticisms and do not handle them well. Some of us don’t want to admit our imperfections and weaknesses. We just don’t want to admit that there’s something wrong with us.  That’s why its easier to divert the attention by blaming others and pointing a finger to someone else. Let’s face it, sometimes, its messier to deal with our own selves.

#4. We can play the victim.

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Photo credit: imgkid

Its easier to play the victim when love’s at play. If other people can see how “bad” the other person is, then we’d be the martyr. We’re the ones who deserve someone better and we don’t need to change anything about us.

#5. We can live in a fantasy world.

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Photo credit: inspiringwallpapers

We stay in a relationship while imagining what the other person can be if they do become emotionally available in time. We fall in love with an illusion of a perfect partner and perfect love. After all, that may be the only thing they can’t provide, right? The emotional commitment? Please think again and wake up.

Living in a fantasy world also provides temporary refuge when we don’t want to face reality. When we’re hurting and feeling unloved, a world of make-believe can numb the pain somehow.

Whether you agree or disagree, it would be best if we fix ourselves first before we enter a relationship. We can’t expect other people to fill whatever void we think we’re missing. And we certainly can’t expect an emotionally available person to commit if we too, in reality are also emotionally unavailable.

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A 13-year-old Girl With Autism Sings A Duet With Weird Al. I’m In AWE!

Most moving performance of Weird Al Yankovic with Jodi DiPiazza and Action Play Chorus. Awesome!

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A biennial event was aired in Comedy Central on Sunday called Night of Too Many Stars benefit to raise money for autism services and educations. One of its highlights featured the 13-year-old Jodi DiPiazza with Weird Al Yankovic  in a duet of his classic song 'Yoda.' Jodi is one talented girl and Weird Al is as exceptional as ever.

I was very touched with the entire performance especially the part where the rest of the boys and girls from Actionplay Chorus appeared on stage, singing with DiPiazza and Weird Al. Everyone was entertained and deeply moved by the epic performance that the audience had no choice - they had to give Jodi and Al a well-deserved standing ovation! ...

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What These Cancer Patients Did Will Make You Rethink What “Stronger” Actually Means

“What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.”

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The viral video below, which features the cancer patients and their caregivers lip-synching and dancing to Clarkson’s famous single, was made by Chris Rumble, a 22-year-old cancer patient wearing an orange T-shirt in the video. In the moving music video, the young fighters were also seen holding up empowering signs like “stronger”, “fighter”, and “hope”.

Rumble, who was diagnosed with leukemia, became the cancer kids’ “big brother” in the ward....

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Inspiring

A Least Popular Kid was Nominated Prom King as a Joke, Until the Most Popular Guy Did THIS!

What act of kindness have you done lately?

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In high school, being popular is what most kids aspire that they tend to forget the value of other things, like kindness.

A certain kid dubbed as the most popular guy in school didn’t let his popularity status get in the way of expressing kindness even to less popular kids in school.

Tyrell Clay, Miller High School’s football quarterback is loved by almost everyone in school. On the other hand, Adam Chadwick, who is obviously at the opposite end of the popularity spectrum of their school, was often called names by other kids in their school....

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