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15 Big-Dick Horror Stories That Will Make You Swear Off Sex Forever

When it comes to sex, is bigger really better? Apparently not. While there’s so much hype about well-endowed men, at times, a giant manhood could mean even bigger problems in the bedroom.

Don’t believe us? Just take it from these people who shared their scariest big-dick experiences with BuzzFeed.

1. The case of the missing tampon.

“I was really horny so I drove 45 minutes to my ex’s house to have sex. The next morning I realized I never took out my tampon. His penis was so big that it pushed the tampon up too far, and I couldn’t get it out. After 30 minutes I gave up and called the guy, asking for a favor. I went to his work, locked the door, pulled out some medical gloves and a towel, and spread my legs on his desk so he could pull out the tampon. He fished around for 15 minutes and finally got it out.” —lauront

2. Granny’s priorities are very clear.

“My ex and I were having sex, missionary. I went to shift the angle of my hips at the exact moment he broke rhythm and give me a surprise, extra hard and fast thrust. This completely destroyed my perineum. I lived with my grandma at the time, and I couldn’t get the tear to stop bleeding. We were freaking out, so I went into the living room, holding the bloody towel over my crotch, and asked grandma what to do. She was more concerned that I had stained one of the good hands towels.” —kourtnip

3. Ouch!

“I hooked up with a guy who had the most enormous penis I’d ever seen. Rather than chickening out, I grabbed the lube and attempted to make it fit. I have dyspareunia, a condition that makes sex very painful, and his dick ended up ripping the lower part of my vagina, a la giving birth-style. I had to have an episiotomy, which meant stitches from my vagina to my ass.”—catfuneral

4. What a mess!

“Years ago I met up with a guy in an empty cornfield. His dick was almost nine inches and thick. Neither of us had condoms or lube, so we foolishly just used spit. A few minutes later, he finished and pulled out. That’s when I noticed the bloody, shitty jizz that was dripping off his dick and down my legs. We didn’t bring anything to clean up with, so we used my underwear. He thanked me and took off. I went to Walmart a few blocks away, bought new shorts and underwear, and changed in the restroom. When I got home, my mom complimented me on my new shorts.” —alecsandyr

5. Too. Much. Information.

“I met up with a guy from Grindr, and he had the biggest penis I’d ever seen. He took his dick out of my ass because it was hurting me too much, and he said, ‘Damn, you made a mess.’ I saw what looked like a gallon of beef stew, and the smell soon followed. He started puking all down my back, and it ran into my hair, eyes, his bed, and the floor. His sister knocked on the door to see what was going on. He ran into the bathroom while I, still covered in poop and puke, tried to put on my clothes. It was impossible to leave with any dignity.” —DutchMN

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